He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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