If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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