I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
