so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Randomize
