so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
