For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize