I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Randomize
