Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize
