he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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