You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
