Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
