did you get engaged???
toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
