I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
