Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
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