Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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