my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Randomize