Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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