Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Randomize
