wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
Four minutes until I can fart!
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Randomize
