Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Randomize