I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I need moral support for this bender
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Randomize
