But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I puked a lego.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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