That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
