I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
you made out with another girl for some wings
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
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