would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize