we have officially lost it.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
