so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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