You can't motorboat a personality
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
i believe in u and ur pee
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Randomize
