just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
How external is "for external use only"?
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
