Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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