worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Randomize
