Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
