I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Randomize
