There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Randomize
