Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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