Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
