Pregnant stripper...not hot.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
My pussy is not your playground.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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