what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Randomize
