You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
