I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
