hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
