guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Randomize
