that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Randomize
