He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
