I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
