Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Randomize
