return my video game
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Randomize
