I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize
