at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Randomize
