Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
