Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
